Well a few weeks ago I was feeling particularly overwhelmed with life. I'd been burning myself out with lack of sleep, too much roleplay, a few tumultuous moments with Dan... just life things. I figured I needed a night or two off to just relax and I'd seen on TikTok that Heartstopper's second season had been released. I watched the trailer and Googled it and saw the reviews were great, Alice Oseman (who illustrated and wrote the source material) is an executive producer and the casting looked stellar. I sat in, hoping it'd pick me up a bit and watched the entire of Season 1 and 2 in a sitting. Then I watched it again. And again with Dan. And a further two or three times by myself over the past couple of weeks. It's done beautifully.

It only strays from the source material where it feels natural and to add depth to supporting characters. It feels like an ideal translation of comic to film. I'd been holding back from buying the physical books, opting to read it on my phone instead, as I don't have a lot of space to be storing stuff right now. Well, fuck that, I said. I ordered all the books - and supporting novels/novellas. I now have a stacked tiny shelf in my room of Heartstopper content and have been making a conscious effort to try read a book/parts of a book at least once a week.

I've been a tiny bit absent from roleplay this last couple of weeks. I just find myself so tired after work and then the times where I"m usually free I just find myself... not in the mood, feeling unwell, or mentally exasperated. It doesn't help that the friends I have that roleplay with me all start playing at like 9pm, where I need to start thinking of winding down. A few comments have been made to me in character that I'm not around enough, but like, how am I supposed to be able to play all night and manage a full time job? Mew's in a position where she can wake up at 8pm and go to bed at 10am, and it doesn't affect her life that much but I just can't do that. I wish I could be around more, but I've just not got that flexibility. I mean, I start playing usually at 4pm after work so by the time everyone else is waking up, it's 8pm and I've already played 4 hours. I used to play 4 hours of video games after work twice a week and struggle with that, back when I was playing Stardew with Viki, Lyle and Birb.

I just hope people realise it's not that I don't want to play with them, it's just... life, you know? I know Mew gets it. She's always telling me to look after myself and put myself first. It's other people that I hope understand. Dunno.

The journal is still going really well. I like writing a diary from a character's perspective. His life is a lot more interesting than mine in a lot of ways. Anyway, that's August done. New goal: write at least two entries in September.